what does it mean to rediscover yourself?
to find who you are supposed to be…

I guess we all have our own devious ways
finding ourselves (but that means we are actually lost)
or is it just that we need to find in ourselves who we’re supposed to be

something that I’ve been wondering about
the whole idea of rediscovery
of finding who I am again
not just being the Carla everyone expects me to be
BUT to be me
in all my random quirkiness
doing things I love
sitting comfortably in my own skin
being authentically me

you see,
I’m learning that the more you’re doing what others are expecting
being who they think you should be
you lose yourself in the process
then it is necessary to be on a journey of rediscovery
to find out what it is that makes you tick
what drives you to be the best possible you
(not the person your family & friends have captured in their mind’s eye for you to be)
because it is so easy to just ease into who & what everyone else wants you to be
to please those around you in order to keep the so called peace
to not stand out to much
to not rock the boat or shake the tree

& yet
we’ve all been created uniquely different
to be our own person
to shake & change & challenge the world

why is it then that we shrink away??
& in that shrinking process lose so much of ourselves??

so I guess that is why this year is my rediscovery year
to find my voice again
to dance to the rhythm of my heartbeat
to be the authentic random quirky Carla