what is in a name?

With us having to find a name for our son, I started looking deeper into names & I believe that there is so much more locked up in a name…

According to the Oxford dictionary the definition of a name is
– a word or set of words by which a person or thing is known, addressed, or referred to.
& the definition of a surname is
– a hereditary name common to all members of a family, as distinct from a forename or given name.

Delving a bit deeper, a good place to start is to look at the history of names. When it comes to names, they were there from the start of creation. Names were given to reflect something of significance or to describe the course of the life to be lived. In biblical times they didn’t have surnames, but were however referred to as the son or daughter of.

With surnames it is interesting… It became popular in the Roman Empire & expanded throughout the Mediterranean & Western Europe as a result. During the early Middle Ages the practice of surnames died out & reemerged gradually at the end of the Middle Ages. First in the form of bynames indicating occupation or a place of residence. Then it developed gradually into what we know it as today. Surnames / family names / last names as we know it is indicative of a person’s family / tribe / community.

The family name is usually placed after the given name, however there are countries & cultures where the family name is placed before the person’s given name. Just one of the little things indicating that different cultures have different naming practices.

When it comes to giving names to children, things can be quite interesting… As to who has input & ultimately who has the final say. We saw even in our own family how important carrying on family names is to certain family members. HOWEVER, we’ve decided to do things just a little different…

We know that a name has power – as with your name, life & purpose is spoken over your life! Proverbs 22 vs 1 states “A good name [earned by Honorable behaviour, godly wisdom, moral courage, and personal integrity] is more desirable than great riches; And favour is better than silver and gold.” Therefor we started out with the meanings that we want to bless our son with & searched for names with those specific meanings! For we know that every time your name is spoken, that which is locked up in its meaning is spoken out over your life.

May you now understand & know that Your name carries weight…
It speaks life & destiny over you!
It proclaims your identity!!

looking back at 2019 & forward to 2020!

Wondering if I may say out loud that I’m glad 2019 has gone…. We’re already almost halfway through the 2nd month of 2020 & it looks like it’s going to be an interesting roller coaster year!

2019 was filled with extreme ups & downs, not a year I want to repeat… It was a tough year with great growth opportunities. If I have to be honest, it was a year that gave us a lot of learning curves. 2019 was also a year we were thrown into the deep end having to learn to trust God & where we experienced His grace, provision & overwhelming blessings.

Trying to leave 2019’s baggage in 2019 seems a bit of a challenge… Although I do believe 2020 will be a blessed year!

So what does 2020 hold for the Wolves?

Stepping into 2020 we know that we can’t do anything without God, that we’re trusting God fully for everything in 2020 & that we are excited about the year ahead!

2020 will bring about a big shake up for the Wolves as we’re excitedly, expectantly awaiting the birth of our WolfPup in May! It will also be a year of long distance relating with my Wolf & with that, learning to solo parent while he’s away.

Something that I’ve been working on for the last 5 years will also come to an end this year… On my birthday in March I’ll be shaving to donate my hair to CANSA for wig making purposes!!

After 3 years of not being on 2 wheels, we trust that 2020 will hold the opportunity to climb back on 2 wheels & experience wind therapy again!!
(I can’t start to try imagine how much Wolf is missing it – if the ache in my heart for it is great, his must be greater!)

WolfGlobal (what you will know as WolfArt & WolfTac) will see some major changes throughout this year – even though we’re quiet now, there are a lot of little things in the pipeline that will result in major changes! So hang in there & be excited for what is to come!

Knowing that this will be an interesting year & that I’ll have to take time to make time to write – whether it is thoughts penned to paper, all about our WolfPup or even about the world through my visor – I know that the excitement about 2020 is building in my spirit!

until the next piece…
kind regards from this side of the screen!

body positivity

I’ve been wondering about something for quite a while… the whole body positivity movement – what it means and what is it good for?

Before starting with the body positivity movement & body confidence let’s start with body image – because I believe they all influence one another.
What is the definition of body image? To summarise the basic concept – Body image is the perception a person has of their physical self and the thoughts and feelings that result from that perception. Now moving on to body confidence – it is basically being confident in your body & living your best life without feeling ashamed & being shamed by the community you find yourself in.

So where does the body positivity movement come in & why has it become such a big thing?

I believe that body image & body confidence influence each other. The more positive & better the image of your body is, the more confidence you’ll have – not just self confidence, but body confidence specifically.

Something I’ve come to notice – the body positivity movement – the emphasis on body confidence, the way it has become something sick & twisted (& YES, THIS IS MY OPINION).
Where we’re no longer looking to create & sustain healthy bodies – encouraging people to be healthy! Body positivity has become a ‘I do not care what you think of my body, I will not stand to be shamed & I will force you to accept & find me attractive no matter what I look like’

Now why would this irk me so much?

In some ways I guess it is because you’ve got the 2 absolute extremes…. Whether I look like a model / a fitness model or at the other end of the spectrum being morbidly obese to a point that it is detrimental to my health

The big irk is because mainstream & social media is forcing body positivity down our throats without looking at it from all angles…. Without looking at it’s larger repercussions…. Without taking into account that to be able to live your best life, you need health – body, soul & spirit.

I believe there should be a balance – to be confident in who you are without having to force others to accept you. (If they do not like you, it is their loss), but still looking to grow as a person & to pursue a healthy lifestyle. Understanding that being able to live your best life needs to include looking after your health, after all, you need your health in order to live life fully!
Balance in who you are as a person – not just physically, but also mentally – looking after your health in a holistic way – body, soul & spirit.

& suddenly it hits me…
The thing of balance – we’ve lost the bigger picture!

We’ve become so focused on either just the body, just the soul or just our spirit – WE’VE FORGOTTEN THAT WE NEED A HEALTHY BODY, HEALTHY SOUL & HEALTHY SPIRIT TO BE ABLE TO ULTIMATELY LIVE OUR BEST LIVES!!

So take up the challenge to grow & go live your best life!!

reacquainted with the realities of a long distance marriage…

When the moment we’ve been waiting for has arrived & I realise that my Wolf will be going & I have to stay behind… It was something I became used to while Wolf was still a lot more active in the reserve force, but as those man days became less & we started working on our own companies – I became used to having him home a lot more…. & don’t forget that for the last 3 months I’ve been working at home with him on our businesses, so now for him to go off on this new adventure – it will be something I have to get used to again…

I’ve forgotten how hard the first days are, having to readjust to a new schedule & having to do things on my own again. Realising that there will be a lot of little & big things we won’t be together for – as he’ll only return mid January next year… [& then the preggy hormones jumps in & I feel like I’m loosing my mind]

I’ve been reminded how different people view our situation – or rather the long distance relationship/marriage thing… Those who’ve been through it, is living the same situation & knows what I’ll be going through vs those who cannot imagine what it could be like to be apart from their loved ones.
Interesting how those knowing what it feels like have different views – either just suck it up & be strong vs they have sympathy because they know it isn’t easy… Which in a way is both correct – because you have to stand strong even though it isn’t easy all the time….

A total readjustment now needs to happen…. Not just getting used to Wolf’s schedule, BUT also recreating my own routine without him here to help with all the things we used to do together. Taking care of normal household chores & taking care of myself and our cat! (even taking over my Wolf’s duty of mouse removal – those the cat brought into the house)

The challenges of long distance communication is real – knowing when I can & can’t contact my Wolf (keeping in mind the small time difference & his work schedule as well). From being able to bother him whenever I want, to have to wait for specific times that he’ll have an internet connection (not that it will stop me from sending him messages throughout the day knowing that he’ll receive them as soon as he’s back at the hotel). Also learning again to not be so glued to the phone & wanting to communicate that I’ll miss out on what is actually happening around me… to live & not just be focused on missing my Wolf!!

Something I’ve been warned against (& I can understand why the warning was given), is to be careful of retracting into a cocoon of seclusion & cutting myself off from the world…. Which is rather easy, but will also drive you mad! To stay connected & to keep reaching out & allow others to reach out to you… It might sound silly – but wanting to curl up in a little ball of longing for your loved one is a real thing, but life needs to go on – knowing that my Wolf is working for our future, I need to live out loud & continue to grow into the future we’re working towards!!

NONE OF THIS MEANS I CAN NOT & WILL NOT MISS MY WOLF – it is just a readjustment of living life fully through this new adventure of ours! Know that even though it might appear that I’m alone, Wolf is just on the others side of the phone & the support network we’ve built up the last couple of years is there to carry us, specifically carrying me through this new chapter in our bigger adventure together!

Focusing on missing my Wolf won’t get me anywhere, so this is actually my own little wake up call to stand up, take up the challenges I’ve been wanting to take on & make the most of the time I’ve got now…. but I’ll still keep an eye on my countdown to homecoming & plan something that will rock his socks off!!

so until the next piece
BE BLESSED & TAKE CARE!!

a new chapter called WolfPup…

& so it started, a new chapter in our adventure! Yes, we’re pregnant!

We suspected it for a while… especially during our gym sessions – when nausea caused some interruptions & my body was just not responding the way I wanted it to… We decided to wait & see what is missed or not & then took the home stick test…

My first reaction was that of tears…. HAPPY tears!! almost had my Wolf extremely worried, until he realised it was GOOD NEWS & happy tears! An ASAP appointment was made & our doctor confirmed the stick test results with that of a blood test & we were happy to announce our new chapter at it’s 6 week mark…

A lot of people said we’ve made the announcement way to soon…. I could not keep my excitement hidden & wanted our family & friends to know what chapter of our adventure we are heading into!!

What an adventure it’s been so far… I could never have imagined how awful morning sickness could be, & I still don’t understand why it is called morning sickness when it lasts throughout the whole day…. I’ve been sleeping my days away as I’ve just been too tired to try something else.
I am truly blessed to be working from home, as I’m not sure how I would have coped in an office…. & with that A MAJOR SHOUT OUT to all pregnant ladies working & dealing with all the preggy symptoms each & every day!

Our news also sent me into a research frenzy….
– what can I eat?
– can I still exercise? (that is if I’d feel up for it)
– what about my motorcycle riding ideas?
– with who will we take on the journey?
all of this lead to some interesting answers….

We decided to take this journey with Estherea Women’s Wellness Clinic. As we walked into the clinic both Wolf & I felt at ease & at home… We had an insightful first visit & was blessed to see our little blessing & hear the heartbeat. (knowing that this is the right choice for us)

[Something about hearing the heartbeat for the first time…. we know that most abortion clinics do not want to show a sonar or let the mom listen to a heartbeat as it will influence the decision to abort (or rather, to not abort anymore). we thought it was just big talk & playing on emotion, BUT that moment we heard our little WolfPup’s heartbeat – we understood]

it seems the jokes about being preggy-brained is also not just jokes…. It has started to show up in all sorts of ways…. So much that although I knew where I wanted to take this blogpost, my mind started wandering again….
so just to make a note, I think I now need a nap….

so until the next post…
kind regards from this side of the screen at our 9 week mark!

toxic masculinity

WHY are we so focused on empowering women that we FORGET to teach, empower & encourage boys to grow up as men?

In the last few months it has turned my stomach & messed with my brain… Why has bashing & demonising the opposite sex, become so important in order to show the strength of women?

It has made me think of what the term toxic masculinity actually means – does it mean that being masculine is toxic? does it mean that all men are toxic? that men should not be?

Let me go back to where I believe this all started. & I know right here so many will roll their eyes & stop reading what I have to say (& that is okay).

Genesis 1:27 So God created man in His own image, in the image and likeness of God He created him; MALE and FEMALE He created them (The Amplified Bible).
We’ve been created in the image & likeness of God – that entails that we’ve been created with purpose & inborn traits that the opposite sex does not have. HOWEVER, with the fall of man (first sin by Adam & Eve – Genesis 3), the world was corrupted. MALE & FEMALE were corrupted, so much so that the purposes, innate qualities, principles, standards & truths of who we were created to be was corrupted.

If there is such a thing as toxic masculinity, then there should also be a thing as toxic femininity?

The use of the word TOXIC is subjective & damaging to all, as it is used to shame & diminish. Toxic behaviour should however be exposed by the name of the action & not by gender, for both genders, so that there can be a united fight against the actions. Taking corrective measures by instilling pride & ownership of true masculine & feminine traits. Teaching, empowering & encouraging boys & girls to grow into men & women who follow biblical standards of what it is to be a man or a woman.

Suddenly I look around & realise – each person has a role to play.
Starting at home with both parents setting the standard to be followed. Teachers, mentors & influencers not just spewing the social narrative, but truly building the next generation into becoming greater examples of how to overcome & be the best we can be. Friends & family encouraging & standing with the parents to build the next generation. NOT just allowing social media to brainwash us with leftist ideologies (wanting to destroy biblical truths & standards). Learning to dig deeper & think beyond what we see and hear.

Remember the following…

hard times create strong men
strong men create easy times
easy times create weak men
& weak men create hard times…

Do I believe there is a thing such as toxic masculinity? NO.
I do believe in traits that can be seen as toxic in both men & women – that does not make masculinity nor femininity toxic.

with my brain melting, I think I need some more coffee…
so until the next piece
be safe & be BLESSED

refresh….

Why is it so difficult to face a blank page with thoughts burning in your mind wanting to be imprinted on a page or to appear on a screen? & then the many questions of where to begin…

Somehow it clicks & the sentences starts to flow

I lost myself & found that my creativity & Carla spark was dying an extreme slow death… It still scares me to think that I could get so busy & in the process lost so much of myself! I fell off the wagon big time – not just mentally, but also physically…. To such a point where I found myself burning out!

In all of this I’m guilty of not paying attention to my gutfeelings (even though I would rather call it the nudgings of the Holy Spirit)… not taking it seriously…. I do believe God used friends and family around me to open my eyes to what was going on – even though I did not listen, nor wanted to take them serious… I had to emotionally & physically break down to see what they were seeing – to see the deep pit I was digging myself into.

& then the big realisation… I took a lot of unnecessary things onto my own shoulders – not allowing others to stand with or even help me. Ignoring biblical principles of allowing others to help carry my burdens, & with me being overburdened, I was not able to help others carry their burdens.

Own hurts & insecurities also over complicated so many things – especially talking about frustrations of what was going on & then to take advice… Where with many it started to feel that their ideas of what I should be attempting was more important than my actual well being – that they just wanted to say something, even when they did not have the full picture of what was truly going on. To such an extent that I did not want to share the darkness I was going through.

Thankfully I have a support network that did not give up on me, even when I was trying to push them away. & most important of all – God never let me go! I was pushed to a point where I had to take some serious introspection…

I had to make a decision to say enough is enough!! & from there I had to take the difficult steps to unburden myself & start to take care of me for the first time in a very long time… Saying it is okay not to be okay, but not getting stuck in it – to step out & get going in a relearning process of self care.

In this process I’m relearning the value of my support network, the value of time for things that lights my Carla spark & figuring out a routine that works for me. & yes, that includes taking better care of my physical & emotional health. ALSO to work on & grow my relationship with God to ensure a healthy balance in all aspects of life!

I am truly thankful for my Wolf who has stood by my side & encouraged me to not lose hope nor faith in God (even in the darkest of times where we both felt like throwing in the towel). God has truly been gracious & we have been blessed in ways that I could not even try to comprehend!! ALL HONOUR & GLORY & PRAISE TO GOD!!

until the next pieces….
kind regards from this side of the screen